there are two questions that left me slightly shuddering when asked by my niece, daughter and son.
On the topics of :
1) Best friend...which I've blogged about it. Came and went and never come back.
and
2) Ambition - I feel sorry for them when I have to tell them about my fickle mindedness of becoming what when I grow up. 4 ambitions with the first and main one of being a princess
MY FIRST EVER ambition was to be ... believe it or not, a princess. The measures that I took to be one:
1) to read up everything that I could about being a princess
2) Watch "The Royal Romance of Charles and Diana" starring Catherine Oxenberg - 18 times on video
3) Use my mom's sheer curtain as a veil for my "Royal Wedding". The lace curtain as as the kembang skirt and the other sheer one as the train.
4) Steal her Max Factor make-up of course and turned it into an awful mess. Dried up her bottle of nail polish.
5) Wear a plastic crown
6) Sleep with a pea under my mattress! (Thanks to the storybook Princess and the Pea!).. oh god.. so bodo!
I swear I was ready to be a princess till i realised that I have to "tekel" a prince first!
Reality bites when I grew a bit more.
I wanted to be a teacher next, just like my mum. Who's been teaching her whole life.
My next ambition was to be a flight stewardess when I realised that I didnt have the height. When I go travelling with my parents, they fascinate me. I cant wait to get back on flight wherever I go, just to oogle at these gorgeous "beings". Cewah at that time only la.. Now tak heran already. Most of them, they cant even speak in proper English. They had better ones then, in those days. The main criteria why I wanted to be one also is because I could travel (so narrow minded I was I didnt even think of the fact that I have to WORK if I'm a cabin crew)
Next was a Club DJ. That's after I had my radio DJ-ing stint with my friend Junaida at Angkasapuri for Blue Network (if any of you could remember this is what Radio 4 used to be).
It somehow landed me here as a secretary/PA or anything of that sort. Guess life has always been "go with the flow" for me.
Plans after this can be insyallah materialised once I'm out of the "office" world. They are no ambitions anymore. They are merely plans to me now. Plans that I have to execute and shout about it less. One of the reasons why people like me, talk about a lot of things except how I earn, elsewhere. A lot of people can say anything with what me and my sisters had, yup true we had it all in our younger days but, there will come a time we have to do something on our own also. I was dissapointed once that people jumped to conclusions that my sister Dana is "selling pantat" abroad. But now, none of us cared. Anymore.
We will remain skint, loaded, selfish, greedy, ruthless with spending, kind/giving, stingy, regardless of when or how we want. Or how or where we stash our income for the children and parent.
Somehow, I most of the time feel, I am an ambitionless person. Downright terok ha me? :D But there's always a goal somewhere in your heart you dont shout about, but you just suddenly feel proud when you are there. Thank god a lot that you are there when you are bestowed something you've always dreamed about and more. Or never thought of and more.
Well, in the end, looks like I'm definitely not gonna become a princess, but thanks to Jr who does so often DEFINITELY MAKES ME FEEL LIKE ONE every single day. :)
